Desert Five: The other Joseph the dreamer

 

I am alien to my own family, my own brethren, my own flesh and blood.

I leave.  

I hide. 

They persecute me for no reason at all. 

And they have all the reasons to hate me. 

One nearly crippled my right knee -- out of jealousy! 

I have kept a distance. 

A safer distance. 

"For my love, they are my adversaries." 

I run away from house when the world is an enemy. 

For, they side with those who disagree with me. 

Tearing more the wounds. 

Never to heal. 

A family is hardly a refuge in time of adversities. 

It's safe to be alone. 

Safest to suffer alone. 

"My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" 

Father and Mother had loved me. 

But both are now past earth-life. 

Jealousy! 

Envy! 

These rule the hearts! 

Why, O God, why? 

Simply because I was loved more? 

Is it my fault? 

Were my parents to blame? 

Or: was it Divine Grace to be favored that much? 

And, no matter how parents tried to make it secret, still would it make manifest. 

The other Joseph the Dreamer? 

Dreams in my sleep that I dream: dreams that came to pass and dreams that are about to come to pass. 

A dreamer of prophecies? 

Or: a prophet of dreams? 

But, God, You know better than I.